Kidderminster Harriers Supporters Team

Always nice to start these match reports with a brief synopsis of the weather conditions/time departed etc upon leaving for an away fans game. However as the author spent the night before the game tucked up in his bed at 9pm in Brighton’s finest and most hospitable penthouse flat with a cup of cocoa in preparation for the big game (ahem!), I’m afraid that isn’t possible. 12 die-hards left the Midlands to play Shrewsbury’s fans that were travelling to Barnet. The game was to be played at the impressive surroundings of Queens School Watford, which sported no less than 6 pitches that, all seemed to be of equal high quality.

Talk meandered as usual through the troops on route to the changing rooms, mainly quoting the new Aviva advert, “thats a fair old poke en it?”. It soon seemed evident though that midfield hardman and perennial hellraiser Mark Young was notable by his absence. Mainly due to the lack of profanity heard and more so due to Smudger believing it was Mr. Young who was the sole instigator for his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle-like skin developing in colour after he picked his trusty boots out of his kit bag.

Anyway, to the actual game....after a thorough Dave Williams warm-up the team was named as follows. (3-5-2) Ackers, Mav, Ollie, Goody, Soupy, D. Williams, T.Hudson, Ben Grazier, Ebbers, Greavsie, The Gaffer. Leaving Director Wayne and the now amphibious Smudger on the bench.

The first 90 seconds of this game set the tone for 90mins, the arrow-like throw of Pountney darted into the box where Mav and Goody had gone up to challenge with the lofty Shrewsbury defenders. The throw resulted in a Goode flick on at the near post hitting the inside of the far post with the keeper well beaten and the unfortunate Mav just being wrong-footed to head in a tap-in. With 2 of the 3 centre backs well out of position the shrews ‘keeper launched the ball forward deep into the Harriers half. With the aid of a flick-on from the striker (using his hands in the process, which he did 8 times during the game in total) his striking partner had the task of slotting past Ackers from 10yards. He did with aplomb. What could have been 1-0 Harriers, was now 1-0 Shrews. There 2^nd and 3^rd goals didn’t take too long to arrive either. We now faced an uphill battle to get back into the game at all.

Pountney rallied his troops and changed his formation to a standard 4-4-2. Moving Soupy and Williams to full backs and pushing Goode into the middle of midfield for the aerial battle. Unfortunately goals 4 and 5 arrived before this change could improve us. We did have a stroke of luck, more of a pity decision really from the referee who awarded a penalty for a foul on Grazier when he was the only man in the box going away from goal. Pounts despatched the resulting Penner, despite the now frog-like Smudger hopping off his lillipad in order to be selected as taker. Shrews grabbed a sixth in between a “Worldie” of a save from Ackers who got a strong wrist (I wonder how he got those) to a well struck shot from Shrews left winger. The winger had incidentally just managed to wiggle Freebie Williams out of his pocket enough to get the shot in, in the first place. A Pount’s corner which sailed directly in made the score 6-2 at the half with Goode again hitting the woodwork again just on the stroke when he should have really scored.

A few hometruths needed settling during our team talk, whilst keeping the fun element we didn’t want to go home with our tails between our legs. Though a tail between his legs would have explained a few things about Smudger whose shins were so green now they looked envious of each other. Ebbers was pulled off at half-time, (which I’m told he enjoyed) and promptly went in search of some cricket equipment to have a bit of net practice whilst he waiting to comeback on. Pounts dropped into midfield with Goode and Greaves as we went in search of salvaging anything from the game. Smith was on at right back, still adamant Young or Matthews were the “brains” behind his incredible hulk look and pleaded his case to the left winger he was marking that the stains were in fact “anti-vandal paint”. I’m not sure if this was a ploy to scare the winger into believing he was about to be marked by a more spritely Ronnie Biggs, but in between dry-humping said winger up and down the right touchline for 45mins and over-using the phrase “get up their arses” he managed to have a decent game.

Shrews bagged another 3 goals; due to lack of concentration, communication but the result was already a formality. Harriers did claim one more goal; Ben Grazier bundled home after a Pount’s corner had been flick-on like Teddy Sheringham in his pomp by Ebbers. The midfield were getting a grip on the game more in the second half, some crunching tackles went flying in, notably Greavesie’s tackle on the hour which was so late he’ll finish it tomorrow. Harriers went close again; Goode hit the bar again with a rising half volley from the angle as did Greaves who attempted an audacious 45yard strike which cannoned off the bar and back into play. The game petered out to nothing really and though we didn’t deserve to win, we didn’t deserved a tanking either. Which the 9-3 scoreline might have suggested. A previously mentioned, the injustice in the 1^st minute set the tone and we never got out of 1^st gear.

With everyone showering and changing it was left to Smudger to provide the entertainment, his feet now so green that Fison’s offered him a deal, was left to ponder how his boots and shin pads had become contaminated with the dye.

All in all, a good run-out but a poor performance against a team that we capable of beating. Next week sees the squad turn out at the same venue against different opposition. Mistakes need to be eradicated to beat Watford. Cracking day though and in the famos words of Jonathan Smith “green army”

Team - Dave Ackerley, Mike Peplow, Ollie Sewell, Mark Connolly, Dave Greaves, Ben Grazier, David Williams, Wayne Allen, John Smith, Tom Hudson, Dave Goode, Andrew Coffield and Dave Pountney.

Scorer - Dave Pountney 2 and Ben Grazier

Man of the Match - Dave Goode

Match report courtesy of Dave Goode